I am having the hardest time right now focusing on school...Everything else is on my mind.

Currently, I have Spring Break on the mind. I'm planning on going to either Las Vegas or San Diego. I am trying to put together a group trip with my friends and so far it looks as though people are leaning toward San Diego. One friend suggested that we get a beach house, but ah...it'll cost quite a bit. I'm hoping we get a break in costs somehow...plus air rates are pretty high right now. I should have planned this sooner...oh well. If there's a will, there's a way.

The other thing I have on my mind is shopping...yes, I know. But I've recently began to get obsessed with shopping LOL. I've been drooling over a new LV print that's due out this May. It's less than $1,200.00. I'm planning on going to Europe this summer so, I was sorta thinking that maybe I should just wait to buy it in Europe. But I don't want to miss it and I have to waitlist for it...which reminds me, I forgot to call LV to do just that. Deng it.

So, on top of that there are other things that I really want to buy. Like sunglasses, a new watch, clothes...and I keep telling myself, wait til you go to Europe.

At the same time, with this trip for Spring Break, I'm almost willing to back out just so that I can continue to save for Europe.

I could skim by school, but I can't!!! If I'm serious about getting into grad school I have to maintain my GPA! And right now, I'm slipping. There are ways to still get into grad school with a lower GPA, but I should at least meet the standard. I'm seriously considering quitting my job just so that I can focus more on school. I need to drop something, but I don't know what it is. Maybe my social life???

Because of all the parties during the winter it sometimes feels as though people expect me to maintain the social calendar and frankly I'm a little fed up with it. I don't have the time nor the energy to keep it up. I'd rather stay home and do homework. I wanted to make this last semester the best semester, but at the same time I have to really focus. I guess I have to shift my priorities. I wish I could just hide out from everyone for the next month or so just so that I could study...ARGH!

I'm sad just thinking about all this...I'm a little stressed. I'm so stressed I've been eating lots of sweets and resting...ALOT! I guess that's how I deal with stress, sweets relax me. So does shopping, but I'm not trying to go that route because I just end up sad when I look at my credit card bill. When I'm depressed on the other hand, then I just don't eat. Plus I shop, which is the worst combination because I can't think straight when I'm hungry hahaha so I buy anything. BLAH!

Anyway, so that's what's been going on with me lately. It's Midterms and I have one tomorrow morning. BLAH! I hate this crud...please school just go away!

Hopefully for the last time, in a long time! OMG, It's my final semester!

Tomorrow is my first day back to school. I'm a little more optimistic this time. I'm also a little more focused. Bad thing is, my first class is at 9AM and I'm still up!

*sigh* I think I'll be fine!

I'm anxious though! I'm anxious for the warm weather. I love going to school and getting out while the sun is still out. I love the summer and the spring. Such great weather.

This winter hasn't been too bad. It just started raining a few weeks ago. California weather is by far the best! We're spoiled. We'll pay it back in karmic dues though, LOL, I truly believe that California will one day break off from the rest of the nation after a huge earthquake and we'll later be known as the island of California. LOL!

Anyway, enough of that sidetrack...I think I'm delirious. Too much partying during the month of January. hahaha It was well worth it. There is one more party coming up this Friday for my friend Ryan's birthday. OMG, I don't know if I can handle another party.

So what else is new? Hmmm...I'm back on a diet! Yup! I want to lose 10lbs. It's not crazy!!! LOL I want to be fit and lean. I have a belly that I want to get rid of. 10lbs ago I didn't have one, hahaha. I want leaner arms and thighs. A tighter booty and a slimmer face. Blah, I hate the way I look in pictures. I think I look puffy. My auntie says it's because the camera adds 10lbs...thus the diet.

I think this semester might be a long semester. I'll be busy with my fraternity, as well as my studies and work. I'll try to not let work get in the way. The great thing about my job now is that it isn't as demanding. I didn't do too bad last semester, I got good grades. The lowest was a C. Which is passing, but isn't that good. Luckily my GPA is still "honorable" LOL!

I'll keep you all posted on how my studies go. Hopefully, I'm successful my last semester and most importantly I hope it's memorable.

So finally school is over. I am glad. I have about 20 more days left of vacation and I'm workin' hard baby, workin' hard!

I work for a law firm now as a paralegal, so I have been busy.

I got through the last semester with a few scrapes and bruises, but I came out okay. I have to work harder this last semester so that I can graduate. It's hard when my mind is somewhere else day dreaming about my future while I'm in class. But I have to make sure that I finish this last goal before I can really think about that.

I cannot wait til graduation! I'm so tired of school right now. I need a break before I start thinking of going back for grad school. I'm thinking of working a couple years straight to get my career going and to get my life straight away.

Anyway, so Christmas and New Years has passed. Would many of you agree out there that it didn't feel like the holidays this year? It didn't for me and I know many people felt the same way too. Kinda eerie.

But now it's January and you know what that means? My birthday is near! I'm turning 27, oh my. For so long I felt old, but for the first time I feel young. Maybe it's because I'm surrounded by a bunch of 40 somethings and 50 somethings, then I realize how much more time I have to do things in my life. It's incredible. I feel great!

Anyway, so this year I'm going to have a few parties for my birthday! One on my actual birthday, which personally will be favorite of them all because we'll be going to one of my favorite clubs. Then we'll hit up something more laid back, a bar where we'll hear a live band. And then finally, which is in the works, I'm planning on having an even larger party at another club. It's mainly so that I could get a bunch of people together and get funky. LOL

So, hope most of you can make it! Keep you posted on how it turns out.

Next week is officially finals week! FINALLY!

Then I get a one month break and then 4 more months until school is over for me! OH MY! It's going to be a busy and great semester. I have plans with my fraternity and I also have plans with the Filipino Club. I just want to be active my last semester of college. When is the last time I'm going to be able to do this?

My birthday is coming up next month. I'll be 27! How do I feel about that? Eh...not too bad. Most importantly my graduation is this May, which I'm way more excited about than turning 27. I've been day dreaming a lot lately and I have a few things on my wishlist.

First off, I want a puppy: Yorkshire Terrier along with a Coach dog collar and carrier!!!

I LOVE MYSELF SO MUCH! hahahaha

For my graduation, I want a Tiffany Cross Pendant:

I think that's enough to hold me down for awhile. Especially since they both will put me in the hole for awhile. LOL!

I CANNOT WAIT!!! HEHEHE I want the puppy for Christmas, but I doubt it because I have nowhere to put the pup...oh well. It'll all have to wait until after graduation.

I am sooooo over school. I can't wait til next semester begins! I hate this semester, I don't know why though. Maybe it's the classes, they're boring. I just wish they weren't so repetitive.

I don't know where my motivation went. I am so unmotivated this semester. I am so thankful that last semester was my hardest semester because if that was happening now, I probably wouldn't do so well. LOL. Let's just see how things work out this semester when I grades come in. At this point, I just hope I pass!

Ya, it's that bad! I know I'll just have a slap on the wrist. What's the big deal?! LOL!!

Sigh, crazy semester!

But I am thankful that I joined a co-ed fraternity! I met some cool people and I'm very proud to be part of such a great organization.

Anyway, I have two more weeks until school is over. Last day is the 20th I believe. I also have a new job working in a law office. The lawyer I work for is pretty well known in the Filipino community here in the Bay Area. He knows my passion to serve the community and issues dealing with Filipinos. It's so interesting why we cross paths with people in our lives. I'm sure he'll be somebody who will help me network with the community. The funny thing is, I think my dad is like 1 year younger than him LOL! SOOO WEIRD cuz he has kids who are still in elementary school. hahaha OMG, so weird!

In any case, I think it's a good place for me to work at. I'll learn so many things.

Anyway, no other news than that! Keep you all posted!

Honestly, I wouldn't know...

I don't feel like I'm in school...it doesn't feel like midterms. I don't feel pressured. I took a few exams already, got good grades. I had a few papers due, no biggie. I even have a 5 page essay due tomorrow afternoon which I haven't even really prepared for because I haven't done any of the reading. Ok I lied I did some right before I jumped on the computer. LOL

I plan to get ready to take a nap and then wake up at the crack of dawn to start writing. Sigh...that's my usual routine. Maybe I'll go to work and do it just so that my body is in the building. Besides, I have all the resources there. I can print my paper and everything. LOL

That sounds like a great idea...

I'll admit I'm bored with school...I thought my senior year would be a lot more challenging. So, since I'm bragging about how easy school has been I better get a good grade. I kind of have a feeling I won't. I'm thinking I'm going to get all B's for my classes. I just have not applied myself. My brain is never in class, it's always somewhere else.

When the professor calls on me I've got an opinion ready for him that I borrowed from another class. Many of the topics overlap and it gets old for me. Hopefully next semester I'll learn something new. Not sure. I'm almost banking on an even easier semester. I just need to get through this and graduate.

I'm even considering on going to grad school. Maybe after I work for a few years, I want to go to Cal and I've done the research...it's pretty darn expensive. So maybe after I pay off an old student loan, put some money aside, work on my career then maybe...just maybe I could go back to school.

If I could work my life schedule any way I wanted to I would take 2 months off from work and live in Europe, maybe in Paris or Rome. I want to be like Audrey Hepburn in Sabrina and come back a class woman.

At this point in my life since I haven't really started my career I still feel like this little girl. I know once school is finished I can really start my life. I want to go to Europe and find myself. I've lost myself. I've always been a part of something and never really been me.

I want to meet new people and I want to hear new ideas and try new things. I want to live life differently. Just need to finish school. I have 7 more months people!!!

Which reminds me, I have to turn in my paperwork =X I can't graduate without it! SHEESH...I'm saddened because I won't have my name on the Graduation thingy... How is that? I'm so bad at these things!

Well hope all of you who read this can go. It will be lots of fun I'm sure. It's on May 24th and the weather is always perfect on grad day too! YAY...I'm excited just thinking about it!

I was looking at the calender a few moments ago and was looking at November and December. I was shocked...I only have 2 months left for this semester. It's crazy...it feels like time flew by and I hardly got anything done. I was falling behind before but now it feels like I'm slowly catching up. And before I know it it's finals! My last final is on December 19th. It's crazy because I'm not back in school until January 23rd.

Then after that it will be 4 more months of school and I'm done! I better do something for spring break...it's going to be my last as a college student. My spring break is the week of Easter...how boring. Hopefully I can go someplace warm...there are just so many plans!

The key is finding balance...

The difficulty is that I feel that I need to spend more time at work, I feel guilty and my co-workers make sure that I do feel it (minus one - she's so thoughtful of my needs! I just love her!).

So, as a result work is hurting school...

But, why even work part-time if that's the situation? Well, the way I look at it is that my team should be able to pick up the slack. Yet, do they? NO!

They don't, instead they act like chaickens with their heads cut off and when I am there I run circles around them. It's pathetic...I think my boss knows that I feel that way about it. And I'm guessing so do the other executives.

I think they're afraid that I'll walk away from the job and lately I've noticed that they've been acting complacent toward me. Companies and corporations will never beg for someone in a position like me to stay, they could easily find a replacement. Essentially, I need this job as much as they need me.

The fact of the matter is, I don't need this job for financial security, I just need it for experience and entry into not only the industry but into the corporate world.

It can be difficult most of the time when you don't have access to the right network of people or to get your foot into the door of the corporate world if you're not already in it.

An honor co-ed fraternity sent me an invitation to join, I'm seriously considering it. I'll need it for my future. Because I've realized if you don't have the experience or know someone who works in the industry you want to get in you'll have a hard time getting in without first paying your dues.

Most college graduates finish school and assume jobs will just be lining up, as was the case for me a few years ago when I finished my Business Degree. I was sure I was going to start off making a certain amount of money but boy was I wrong. My pride was crushed and I thought of an alternative way to handle that, go back to school and study to be a nurse. How even more naive of me!

I felt like I was conforming to an ideal, be a philanthropist and get paid doing it! I wanted to work with children with life threatening diseases and disabilities. Right before I was about to go into Nursing School, after two years on working on prerequisites, I decided to bail. Why? Because I was being realistic. Do I want to work long and hard hours and get paid at most $70K? Um no...

I realized my goals were higher than that...I realized I had so much talent and potential. I could make twice that and do less work in the corporate world...I could be a philanthropist for free by volunteering my time.

The reality of my situation now at work is that I'm not going to be doing what I'm doing for long, it's temporary and I will transition to bigger and better things. But, do my co-workers realize that? I don't think that they do. I think they feel that I am going to retire in my position like they'll eventually end up doing. I don't think they realize that there's a broader horizon in my future...

Overall, I think that if I suck it up, deflect all the hatred and focus mostly on school then I should be able to graduate on time with honors and still find a place to work at after. I just need to be professional about all the stupidity I'm surrounded by and be humble about it all. Beggars can't be choosers!

So, school is makin' a comeback...

Ya, I'm kinda excited. My last year and all...WOW I'm almost finished. FINALLY! And here's the situation with the JOB. I'm keeping it. Yes sir!

So, they know my situation. They know I want to finish and they know I want to finish right away. So I can keep the job on a part-time basis. But the thing is, the place is pissin' me off!

I'm a temp, there are a couple of perms...and they suck butt...

One has been there longer than me by a month, she's older though, and she still can't get her shit together. I respect the woman and all, but damn I pick up the slack.

So, I'm worried. What will happen when I'm not around to pick stuff up when it's fallen? I'm sure they'll all survive, but they'll run around like chickens with their heads cut off. (Should I care, probably not...)

I'm dissatisfied with the job really. I feel like they should pay me more for what I offer them...but unfortunately I can't ask for much if I'm just around part-time. What can I do?

Nothing I guess. Just suck it up?

Once school starts back up again, I won't be around much..I'll be busy. I'll deal less with my incompetent co-workers...and more with academics.

My brain is bored at work, that's what it is...I need a challenge. So, school will feed my need for brain-food.

Hopefully that will feed my boredom and I will love my work again. It sucks being young and talented, we just want more more more. It's so true...

What should I do? Should I ask my boss for fun and interesting projects??? Hmm it's a possibility!

Hopefully things that will have something to do with Marketing and Sales...hmm interesting!

*sigh* If things don't improve for me in 1 months time, I definitely need to take some action.

If I don't get approached with an offer, then I'll approach with a suggestion. If I don't get what I want, then I'll look elsewhere...

Hopefully, the place I find will pay me more if I have to look somewhere else...

I've got the perfect situation really, but let's just see if it's meant to be. I'll keep you all posted!

DRUMROLL.....3 B's and 2 A's. Whaaaa! I don't know why I was hoping for 5 A's. LOL It's not like I worked my butt off. I stressed out waaaay too much over this past semester. I wish I would've planned it better. Next semester should be better. I don't know if I could pull off 5 A's.

I'm guessing I'll get 4 B's and 1 A. It's hard when you're not very into the subject. I'm greatly considering on getting a part-time job. I like to have money in my hands so I could always reward myself for working hard in school. It'll probably motivate me to do well too because I'll be reminded of how I hate doing menial work and that I'm going to school for a better future! YAY!

My other choice is to keep the full-time job and go to school part-time, which doesn't interest me much because I know I'll always think about how I wish school was over. So, I might just do the part-time thing.

Anyway, still haven't heard about that job thing. They said that they're doing my background check, darn...that thing takes about a week for it to come back. So, I most likely won't start on Monday. Boo hoo!

I calculated everything and it looks like I'm going to work on paying off my bills. Darn it! No shopping and no trips for me this summer it looks like! We'll see, we'll definitely see. Because I wanted to do a trip down to LA with my non-related cuzzo Crystal and I have a trip planned for San Diego in September for my friend's wedding. OMG! LOL That means I've got to get them a gift too! Oh golly gee wilikers!

Either way, I've got to enjoy my summer! I cannot wait! YAY!

Hello everybody! Finals week officially started yesterday, I believe, but today was my first final. What a piece of cake! Yay! I have two exams to study for. I'm apprehensive about them because I don't really know my material. But I'm sure once I study everything will be fine.

I am a little worried about the work situation. The agency I signed up with set me up with an interview for a temp-to-hire position, which I am almost positive I don't want. I might have to e-mail them today retracting my application. But anyway, that was the only thing they found for me! I'm really disappointed. I turned in my resume to two other agencies, hopefully they'll get back to me ASAP. I found a two-month position and sent my resume, but two-months is just not going to cut it. I need at least three months! I don't know what to do if I don't start working on at least the 29th.

I'm so worried now! I am willing to work at a mall, whatever it takes! I need the green! AHHH!!!

I don't know what to do if I'm jobless on that day. If I don't hear anything by next week I'm filling out applications at the mall LOL! I need work, I need work, I need work...anybody out there know of places that are hiring??? Hehe

Alright, so I'll leave for now but I'll be back as soon as I hear something from one of those darn agencies!

Hey all! Just wanted to take a break from all the studying and writing I have to do for school. In exactly 2 weeks from today school is over for me! I'm a little scared, I need a job. So, I hope that it all works out for me.

I should be thankful that at least the hard part of school is over. I have two more papers to write, one due tomorrow at 12pm that I haven't even started on! haha And I have 3 big exams on finals week. *sigh* I wish I could just close my eyes, open them and everything is over! But I can't, I actually have to work...

At the beginning of the semester I was aiming for all A's...but at this point I'm willing to settle for a 3.0 this semester. Which is kinda sad for me, but my dad pointed out that it was actually quite impressive. As I reflect on it, I realize that 1) I'm taking one course over the full load, 2) one of them is a senior course, 3) and I was taking a course that was the prerequisite of the others.

If I had not taken the senior course, life would have been a whole lot easier. I should have taken one of the easier upper-division courses like "Physics of Music" or something silly like that! LOL! Darn it! Oh well, before next semester I should have the whole summer to plan what my ideal schedule should be like. I'm hoping to have the perfect balance of easy courses and a few hard ones. *sigh* The idea of it makes me feel exhausted!

I have been sooo tired these past two weeks. For leisure, I did some shopping. I bought myself a new bag...it's a LeSportSac Tokidoki tote! It's cute! This weekend I'm going to try to treat myself to a mani/pedi! I wanted to get my hair done as well, but I just don't have the time to. Darn it! So, I'll try to do that next weekend. I really need it. Hopefully I'll feel more refreshed...I really need to spoil myself for working so darn hard haha!

Ah tonight I have to pull an all nighter, I've got a paper due at 12pm tomorrow. I cannot believe it! I think I should ask for an extension...LOL yeah right! I'm too much of a chicken to ask for one hehe. It's all in my head I just need to write it out. But I'm mentally exhausted from all the work I had to do this week.

Also, in about three weeks from now I can buy my long awaited LV purse!!!!!

What so sad about it is that since I've been waiting this long, I have rethought my decision. I don't know if I want the same handbag anymore... But when I walk into that boutique I just know that the Sales Associates will help me pick out a great one if I do end up changing my mind. I just hope that it'll stay in the same price range as my original choice.

Alright, break time is over! Back to work...

Hi everyone! So, my anxiety attacks have mellowed since the last time I wrote a blog. hahaha

I feel alot better now. I seem to be catching up with my work so I am very thankful for that, now I just need to make sure that I do not stay behind.

Anyway, so today I interviewed with a staffing agency. It went great! The recruiter even complimented me on how well I interviewed. As you all know, I CANNOT WAIT TO WORK! She gave me the impression that I might not find the perfect situation.

Which is: A 12-week contract, 40 hours/week, M-F, 8-5, near Mtn View and starts at the end of May! haha

Oh plus if it was at the salary I'm asking for. So far, the one position available now is far and the pay is far too less... So, I started thinking about applying for another staffing agency. I'm looking for one, so if any of you out there know of a good one let me know!

Afterwards I went to the mall...(what's new?) and I was drooling over the new handbags out at Coach. Then I shopped around for clothes (didn't find anything) and I started to realize that I need to buy new business clothes. *sigh* I don't fit into my old clothes anymore...and those clothes are barely a year old! I'm thinking of bumming around for old clothes from people. Anybody out there that wants to donate old business clothes???? I wear anything between size 1-3. hehe It would really help.

Other than that, I am excited to say that I will be making my new handbagpurchase soon!! It should be in exactly 5-weeks from now! I am excited!!! I just need to stay real focused, I have been bad lately. I have to keep my eye on the prize!

My dream purchase would be the LV speedy 25 in azur, the matching pochette, and maybe a zippy or a cles in the vernis framboise.

After that I dream of making an MC purchase. I love that print! It is just my favorite, I love them in both black and white. I haven't planned it out thoroughly b/c I know my mind will eventually change.

I want to also spread my wings into Chanel and all the other fun brands! But I figure I should get some more LV's to round out my collection.

I'm excited!!! I cannot wait for school to end and summer to start! Ok I'll keep it short b/c I know I must bore you with the long ones hehe!

I am literally losing sleep over school. Can you believe that??? I wake up at 4am to write a paper that is due at 10:30am. Ain't that crazy? I had 4 papers due last week and each morning I woke up at the crack of dawn to write them up. Ahh it's so lame. One was a research paper for history, I lagged on that because I had to do lots of reading (2 books). Lame. The other papers were drafts. So that was extra lame. I suppose I didn't have to turn them in, but what is the point in that. I need the extra points, so might as well get them.

This week isn't so bad, I have until Thursday to turn in a 7 page paper (2nd draft). And on Tuesday of the following week I have another draft due for a different class, approximately 5 pages. So, what's so damn hard? I guess just finding the time to do the reading and research without going crazy!!! I have 10 books I have to read for this semester, I finished 6 so far. So, it's really the damn research that drives me crazy. My professors want us to use scholarly journals for our research, I have to have at least 4 of them for the research...I have anywhere between 15-20 articles to read per major project (I have 2 major and 2 minor projects). Each article is usually over 20 pages long. LAME!!!

At the beginning of the semester I was so hype, I was speedreading, I was happy. Now, not so happy. I'm too stressed out to speed read because I can't concentrate. I think my mind drifts thinking about how much more shit I have to read.

I get real cranky with a lack of sleep, I'm sure for all of you too. Yesterday was a nightmare for me. I had a big exam to study for this morning and what do I do when I get home. Fall asleep! It just caught up to me. Sigh.

I've been in college for so long. I worked on 3 degrees, 1 completed and hopefully this current one will be completed. But don't fear, I've been the most dedicated with this major. I haven't been as serious as I once was, probably because everything else comes so easily to me (also probably another reason why I procrastinate - because I know it'll be easy). Bad, bad habit!

I think I'm doing B+ work, my efforts are B+ so therefore I may get that average grade in the long run. My hopes of course are for an A all the way! I have 5 classes: Social Theory & Practice, Women Studies, History, Senior Seminar on Islam, and Sociology Writing. My major projects are for my Senior Seminar and my Sociology Writing class, they want 20 page papers due at the end of the semester. Nice. And I have to minor projects, research paper on feminism in Women Studies and an ethnography on the Latino community for Social Theory & Practice.

I cannot wait til school is OVER! One more year to go, can I handle it without working???? AHHH! I need a job, I need to get back into the real world! I'm itching for that chance. I don't need this degree, I don't need to finish...but it's for my own pride. It is to satisfy my own needs for a sense of accomplishment.

I will come away from this experience with a Bachelors degree, the lowest degree that grants one respect in our society. In the next generation, can't say that will still be true. Most likely respect will only be granted to those with higher degrees. I'm hoping that my younger cousins will complete a PhD. Which will most likely happen with my help. I'll give them the secrets of the ins and outs of college. And they'll succeed because they have the passion. One of my younger cousins wants to be a doctor, now she's leaning toward dentistry. That's more likely in my eyes. I can see that happening. She better buy me a bunch of Louis Vuitton and Chloe handbags once she opens her first practice! hahaha

So great about my cousins. I was hanging out with them the other day. Gawd I see so much of myself in them. They're better than I was though, because they're that new generation. They're smarter, they're cooler, they're just more than we'll ever be...they're our future. I have two cousins here in California, Geralyn and Esthermay. We call them Lyn and May. A clerk at Starbucks asked if we were sisters. How weird! I didn't think we looked that much alike. When they were younger, people used to ask me if they were my kids! WTF?? hahaha I always took care of them. I did more back then than I do now, but hopefully that'll change. They're going to be heading to college soon...that's why I'm working my ass off to be finished right away. They need guidance. No one was really there for me to tell me how college is, so I want to make sure that I'll be there for them.

They are such smart and great kids, I just want them to understand their true potential. Just because their parents never completed college degrees, I want them to understand that they can strive for more. Hopefully when I have kids, they'll have that same understanding. Just because I stopped at a Bachelors, it doesn't mean that they're not destined for something better.

Ahh life is crazy. I cannot believe that my kid cousins are getting old. It makes me feel old. It makes me feel like I need to start getting crackin' with my own life. I need to set the wheels in motion (don't you just love cliches?). Everytime I see preschoolers I get emotional, I can't wait til I have a few of my own. My late grandmother's sister came into town the other day, she asked me why didn't my boyfriend and I get it over with already. hahaha Really, it's because of school. But once that's over, what then? We've been talking about marriage from the first instance we fell for each other (more him than me, haha!) and we've figured out the logistics, but it's still overwhelming for me. I want it to be right, not right now.

I'm afraid, I just need to be sure in my heart that this thing will last. We will see people. I've got one more year in school. We will definitely see. I will tell you this much though, it's getting more and more intense. I'll keep that to myself for now...I think it's for another blog. haha! Bye, keep you guys posted on my boring yet crazy life!

I'm on Spring Break right now and when I get back there should be 7-8 more weeks to go. I have a few 20 page papers to write and I'm not really looking forward to them. I am so bored with school, I feel like I'm going to crack. I wish all I had was one more semester. I guess in some weird way it's possible, but I'm afraid I might not be able to handle it. I have 9 more courses to complete until I get my degree. What worries me is going through another year of school and not being able to work. I think I'm over reacting. I'm sure as long as I buy myself a great handbag to hold me over, then maybe I should be fine.

I am longing for a new handbag...I wanted to buy one before I go to Hawaii, but I might just wait til I go to Hawaii. It might be cheaper. Can anyone confirm??

I cannot stop day dreaming...when all you do is study and go to the mall to kill time, you just day dream of what you're going to do with your money once you get it. When I used to work full time, all I did was worry about when I was going to finish my degree. Ah, the grass is always greener on the other side. Never really fully satisfied. I wonder if I'll be satisfied once I'm done with school and actually get to working. Most likely there'll be other things I'll worry about. Like figuring out when I'm going to get my first house and when I'm going to start my family.

Is school over yet? hahaha

Alright so, the first week of the semester is over. I survived. I've been doing a lot of reading, let's hope that I continue with that momentum for the rest of the semester. I have 2 classes that requires that I write a 20 page paper and a writing class that requires that I write at least 34 pages, but I think they'll mostly be revisions of the same paper that will add up to that many pages. So in truth, it'll probably be 10 pages at most. Sigh. It's dawned on me lately that I'm truly getting into my Senior year and that it'll just get harder. I'm trying not to freak out. In reality I want it to be quick and painless. Anyway, my schedule is a little retarded but less retarded than what was originally going to happen. Mondays and Wednesdays are my perfect days. I'm in at 10:30am and out by 1:15pm. My Tuesdays and Thursdays should've been from 10:30am-2:45pm. But no, because I didn't plan it well I'm in at 10:30am and out by 5:45pm. I get a lot of reading done between times which is good. After class on those evenings I'm excited to get home so I can catch up on my favorite shows. It's funny because I get disappointed when Kenney gets home early when before I would get excited because I'd be bored out of my mind at home alone.

So that's an update on my school, here's an update on my diet. I've gained 2lbs. Which worries me a little because it could be a downward spiral from there. I've gotten comfortable with my size and I've gotten lazy about exercising. My weight gain is caused by a lack of exercise, lack of fiber in my diet and an excess of sweets! I'm thinking that as soon as I get back to my original weight, that I was going to lose another 5lbs as a yo yo weight so that I could stay within my size. Gaining weight is inevitable. So, I'm going to try to keep it where I'm comfortable. I'd be disappointed in myself if I went from where I'm at to 5lbs heavier because that would put me at a size larger. Sounds crazy, but it's true.

It's Superbowl weekend and the house is going to be crazy. Lots of emotion is involved with this game, but I guess I should be thankful that the Raiders aren't in the Superbowl this year. Otherwise...it would be worst! It'd be crazier! He'd be there in Miami as we speak tailgating for the game and sitting on a seat that cost anywhere between $500-$1000!!! Hopefully our team will win!

Alright, well I'll keep you guys posted on everything! Hopefully I can survive the next 15 weeks!!!! YAY! I can't wait til school is over! HAHAHA.

Ahh Spring Semester is near...
I can't wait to go back to school, finally something to do. I'm a little stressed rightnow b/c they dropped one of my classes due to low enrollment. So hopefully on the first day of school I can add a class. I'm hoping that I'll be able to add a class at 9AM but it looks like they only have one more space available, which means it'll be unlikely that I'll be the person to fill that spot. There's another class available at 4PM which gives me about a 4 hour gap between a class. I hate that shit! I'm trying to be cool about it, but damn it sucks. It's either that or change my whole schedule, which is way too risky. Sigh...this is why school sucks.

Other than that, all I gotta do is buy my books and I'm set for Spring. I was way more prepared last semester than I was for this one. Oh well, hopefully next Fall I'll know better. I kinda want to take a class during the Summer but I think I'd rather work. I hope I'll be able to make enough money to help out around the house AND be a big spender!!! It's weird, now that I make no money I like shopping a lot more. HAHAHA It's bad, I know. I'm only like this because it's not my money I'm spending. When you work 2 long weeks and all you get is a tiny paycheck, which you've already spent...it's hard to enjoy shopping.

Anyway, I pray to God that I do well this semester just like I did last semester. I got one B last semester, I'm a little disappointed with that because I know I could've gotten an A. But oh well. Hopefully I do just as well this Spring. Oh just that word gets me excited because I associate that word with warm weather and sunshine! Oh boy I cannot wait for hot weather so I can tan! Yea, I know I'm dark already but hey I'm not dark all over! hahaha. I love being tanned. I'm glad I'm with a guy who loves tanning too. I'm just lucky that I'm not with a pasty white guy hahaha!

I can't wait to start wearing tank tops and shorts. I just miss the sunshine. I hope that I can hang out with lots of friends and cousins. I'm very optimistic about this Summer! I've got a pool I can hang out at every single day. Which is pretty damn exciting. It just reminds me of when I was a kid hanging out at my Auntie Minda's house every summer. Sigh the memories! My cousin's loved it when people would come over to use the pool because it was like a pool party! I mean there were a lot of pool parties back in the day. It was just soo cool at their place because they had such a big pool. And whenever I didn't have a suit my cousin had so many that she was always able to spare one! I miss those days. Whenever I think about that family I think about how that's the way I want to raise my kids. Those kids had everything they wanted and they had it in excess. I remember my girl cousin would have different colors of the same dress in her closet. She was so willing to give her stuff away to me. She was very generous, just like her mom. I mean they were rich, but they weren't snobby or selfish. I want to raise my kids to be that way some day.

Whenever I talk about kids I always wonder what mine would look like. Are they going to have my dark skin and long straight hair? Will my little girl be a spitting image of me? Will she have beautiful eyes and a big smile?? Will my little boy have my sense of humor and be animated with facial expressions whenever he tells a story? I'm excited to find out how it'll be.

One semester down, one in progress and 2 more to go! Then I can begin day dreaming in detail. I'm excited about what I'm going to do in my future. I'm excited to get this semester over with and onward to Summer! Well, I'll let ya'll know what happens with the classes. Hopefully things work out the way I want it to. See ya!

I'm so glad finals are over! I can't wait til next semester. Hopefully I'll be able to register for classes soon, right now I'm not able to because I've got a hold on my record. It's over something totally stupid b/c they have everything that they need. So, I'm just waiting on that. Besides that I'm going to be super bored because I have no job other than "housecleaning".

But I did get to decorate the Christmas tree whoo hoo! Here's a picture of the tree, it's missing a topper because I haven't found one I liked yet. Plus I don't have a tree skirt. One of those things range from $50-$80! Ain't that crazy? I'm thinking of going to Big Lots and getting one for a better price. He he. Some people think it's weird that I used black ornaments, but I just wanted to be different. I think Kenney kinda likes it because it's Raider colors. I think he thinks that I'm doing it for him. Haha. I actually love it!

I couldn't find a lot of black ornaments though, they were pretty expensive. I bought silver letter ornaments for myself, Kenney and Laura. There was even a little jingle bell with Laura's name on it that Kenney already had, so I bought one with mine and his name too.

There are a few sports ornaments also, we got the Hook 'Em and Raiders. We're still missing the Yanks and Michigan-Go Blue! Maybe we'll get them next year. Oh I even got this cute little ornament that says "Our First Christnas Together". I was able to find one that I could put our picture on, it's one of my favorite ornaments on the tree.

I've been kind of going ornament crazy, I want to buy more and more ornaments. I guess I can't help myself since it's my first real tree, so I'm trying to take it easy. I'm also going Christmas present crazy. If I was living comfortably I would get almost everyone I knew a little gift. Even if it was a cheap $5 gift, I'd make sure it was something well worth the money and that the gift was well thought out. Keeping in mind that it would probably be something they'd like. I'm a weirdo like that. Hehe. I love Christmas!

It's going to be a long Winter break!
What's a girl to do??? Since I quit working, there really hasn't been much for me to do but clean and do homework. I get so bored. So, during break I'm thinking of reading a book. I was going to read a book by this teacher named Ron Clark, but I think I'll wait til I'm closer to having kids of my own. If you don't know who he is, Google him, he has a very inspiring story. There are a bunch of novels that I'm thinking of reading over the break, but just can't narrow it down to one. I want something that'll just suck me in and I'll end up finishing in a day. I love those types of novels! So right now I'm on a search for a great novel. If any of you out there have any suggestions please leave a comment! Alright so I guess I've bored you enough with my boring life. Hopefully it'll get more interesting as we get to the new year! Whoo Hoo.